Loss = Love

Yesterday after work at Abuelita's, my brother and I went to a Chinese Restaurant to see my mom and Auntie Cristina with 5 of their first cousins. Here is the picture of the 7 Mexican women that completely dominated the Chinese Restaurant last night.

Two of the cousins or primas live in Guadalajara, Mexico and came because my great-aunt Maria Lupe hasn't been doing well in the past couple of weeks. Maria Lupe is my late grandpa's older sister and she is almost 93 years old. This little reunion was so special, because it hasn't happened for a while, and it was meaningful since almost everyone at this table has lost one parent in the last 10 years and now had this in common.

My grandpa died 11 months ago today at 83 years old. Exactly a month from today will be his "death day" celebration and that idea is completely overwhelming. I feel him with me and in the other room when I'm taking care of my grandma, and everytime I see his chain around my neck. I always say that I wish people talked about death more because I felt somewhat alone when I was mourning in New York. I'm starting to realize why people don't though, it stings so terribly and makes us think about our own mortality, which can be scary.

Amanda my best friend since Kindergarten is leaving for Boston in two days, which means that I won't see her for 6 months, until after Argentina. I have had to say many goodbyes in 2009, some more permanent than others, nevertheless they have become much harder for me to get through. All the adventures I have had and been blessed with come with a cost since I am always away from people that I love--whether its my family and childhood friends, or my New York family.

I was happy to see my mom reuniting with her cousins because even though our lives have all recently had the pain of loss, they all stay in touch, which I think is most important! So even though I always miss people, it reminds me that I have loved people, and they have loved me, and still do, so in the end its worth it!